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Out & About: The JSD (Just Started Dating) Valentine Dilemma

Valentine’s Day can be tough for any couple whether you’ve been together a month, a year or a lifetime, but there are few things more uncomfortable than having a Valentine you hardly know.

If you happen to end up on a great first date in the first few weeks of February, the inevitable question, “What are you doing for Valentine’s Day?”, will come up.

And if you haven’t sufficiently prepared yourself with a pre-planned singles only “Anti-Valentine’s Day” celebration, you could be stuck as the unfortunate second date Valentine.

If you do end up in this sufficiently awkward situation, it’s time to throw your hands in the air and embrace the experience. After all, there are worse things than being wined and dined by a complete stranger in North County.

So, for all you locals facing the dreaded “I don’t even know you’re last name” Valentine, here’s your guide to making the most of the situation:

Don’t Worry About a Pricey Gift:

Guys, I would suggest buying flowers. Nothing overly romantic.

Keep it simple, classy and fun. Tulips are always a great choice. They don’t say, “I’ve already started saving for the ring,” but they still show that you are excited about the date and spending more time together.

Keep it Casual:

You barely know each other and there is no way your date is going to feel comfortable with an overly romantic evening. So, keep it mellow. If you’re date is an outdoorsy type, take them on a hike through Torrey Pines or San Elijo Lagoon and catch the sunset. It’s just the right amount of romance without over doing it. If you’re feeling brave, bring a blanket to sit on and some snacks for the occasion, that way if you run out of things to say to each other, you can shovel brie and crackers in your mouth rather than focus on the deafening silence.

Make it a Social Event:

If dinner is on the itinerary, try to make it a double date or full-blown group event. If it’s not possible to pawn your awkward date off on your friends, make a reservation at a trendy restaurant with a cool and social environment. One that I love is the patio at Masuo’s in Solana Beach or Le Papagayo in Leucadia.

Focus on Fun:

It’s hard to carry on a 2-hour conversation with someone you’ve known your entire life, let alone someone you met at The Union a few days earlier, so plan a date that’s full of fun and distraction.

If your date is a dive bar type, take them for a game of pool at The Shanty or if you want to step it up a bit, head over to Belly Up for a fun show, dancing and drinks.

That takes all the pressure off of being a “Valentine” and makes for a fun evening no matter who you’re with.

Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be some big romantic production. It’s all about spending time with the person you want to most and having a great time.

So, if you find yourself stuck in the JSD Valentine predicament, forget the fuss and romance, and keep it casual while enjoying all our little San Diego bubble has to offer.

Carli Leavitt is a Cardiff native who spends her free time surfing, blogging, and enjoying all San Diego has to offer. Follow her on Twitter @CarliLeavitt.



Shea February 8, 2014 at 10:40 pm

Great advice Carli.

Lisa Ledesma February 7, 2014 at 9:31 pm

You are AWESOME! I love love love your articles!!!!!

Marty Palmer February 7, 2014 at 7:13 pm

Loved the article. Keep it simple is my motto!

Comments are closed.