The Coast News Group
Small Talk

Annoying little weeds sprouting up all over

The invasion has begun! They’re large, and green and really annoying.

Well, no, I haven’t seen any UFOs, but when I walked out into my yard this week, I made the mistake of looking down.

There I found the healthiest collection of native plants (aka weeds) I have seen in some years. It seems like they just popped up when I wasn’t paying attention, although I haven’t paid attention since September.

If you recall, I spent last summer on my hands and knees, sprucing up my backyard for my daughter’s wedding reception. During that process, I put in a king’s ransom in groundcover. I now admit that this was not my most clever idea, since the feet of friends and family thoroughly mashed said groundcover throughout the festivities. There was scarcely a recognizable leaf left the next day, but by that time, I no longer cared.

It has taken me six months to care, even a little, but judging by the size of those green beasts alongside my fetching pathway, I need to care pretty soon. If I fail to remove them, the aforementioned path will return to the jungle. I armed myself with trowel and gloves and started pulling.

One problem is the time it will consume to clear them all out. In comparison to the entire yard, it is only a small area, but when you’re bent over digging and pulling, it seems to stretch to the horizon. I foolishly thought it would be a one-, maybe two-day task. Three days later, I have only conquered a quarter of the patch. My enthusiasm has badly flagged.

I also had some trouble discerning between the weeds and the groundcover. If I could just limit the weed invasion to, perhaps, that stuff that looks like the tops of carrots, I would call the job done and put my feet up. There are, however, half a dozen weed shapes and sizes, happily sprouting along my well-fertilized garden path. As hard as I squint, it just does not look like the English garden I was shooting for.

I have, thus far, needed surgical precision to remove weeds, yet spare the remnants of groundcover. I began hoping for a lengthy rainstorm as an excuse to delay further weeding, but, of course, by the time things dry up, the ground I’ve gained will be back in the enemy’s hands, or leaves.

I think it may be time for a different tactic. I love the smell of Roundup in the morning.

Jean Gillette is a freelance writer rather wishing for a brief but severe frost. Contact her at [email protected].