Women, they have this thing … the familiar sound goes “tick, tick, tick.” Do you know what I’m talking about? If you’re a man, you probably don’t. However, if you happen to be one of those women in the mid- to late 30s like me, you can hear the sound of the clock hanging over your head. It’s your internal clock. You know, that loud biological one that makes women leap into any man’s arms during those critical two to three days of the month?
Maybe I went through the baby thing at an early age. While most women in their 20s just wanted to party, follow their careers and waited to marry later, my Midwestern roots had me convinced I was already an old maid.
As you might have guessed, I did marry young, and I had a son before I was 30. Now as life presents new chapters, with new adventures, I am at the end of my 30s looking head on into adulthood, newly married a second time, with another clock now … ticking for a second time.
OK, babies. I love them. I really do. I wasn’t one of those pleasant pregnant women that went around with rosy-red cheeks with the perfect glow. No. I was big, fat and pregnant. If you looked at me sideways you would’ve thought of a refrigerator, because that’s how wide I was. Not some delicate Ranch mom with skinny bird legs, and a perfect “pop belly.” Why I had to be an unusually fat pregnant woman, I don’t know.
The good news is I’m somewhat vain. If I gain weight, I have been able to drop it fast at the sight of my body looking like a deep freeze. Thank goodness I’m fairly athletic. So don’t worry, if you think I’m going to pull a “Jillian Michaels” and adopt a baby because I don’t want to subject my body to another pregnancy, you’re wrong.
I did have one of those “desperate housewife” moments over the weekend, when I had a funny conversation with one of my other female counterparts. My girlfriend and I were discussing how soon does a woman need to have a child before it’s too late? Here was basically our discussion on the phone, beginning with my girlfriend’s first erroneous statement:
“You know if you don’t have a baby by the time you’re 35, your eggs dry up.”
I remind her I have a 10-year-old. “That equation doesn’t apply to me though, I have had a baby, and that’s not even true anyway.”
“Jackson is now 10. How old are you?”
My girlfriend knows my age and if you read my column, you know that I just turned 39 as I tell her on the phone.
“Well, you better stop waiting. What are waiting for?”
This is truly a sensitive question. If you’ve ever been married, you know what the first two years are like. The dreaded baby question follows you everywhere you go.
“We going to start trying next year,” I tell her with ease.
“If I were you, I better get with it. You’re not getting any younger.” Then we segue into discussing Botox and how I haven’t used it. Although, ask me in another 10 years.
I guess if I have to suffer through the chimes and dings of the biological clock once again for the man I love, I will. Women must bear what they can and when they can. Because in the end, it’s not about a clock, a sound or what your friends may think or how you feel your life should be defined. You make your own story. I believe in being bold, funny, and most of all, I believe in the miracle of women and babies and friends and the possibility that there is hope around every corner.
Around Town
On May 15, Kids Korps held their swanky gala at the beautiful estate of John and Patricia Queen in Rancho Santa Fe. Conseiller Culinaire was none other than our very own Ranch resident Bertrand Hug, owner of Mille Fleurs and Mister A’s. Sometimes life repeats itself and a picture of Maggie Bobbileff with Denise Hug happened to be one of my favorites that I had snapped from the cocktail mixer in the early afternoon. I just had to share it in my column for this issue. This Super Star Gala is definitely on the must attend list in Rancho Santa Fe. For information on Kids Korps USA, visit www.kidskorps.org.
Later that evening, I met my good friend Krista Lafferty at the Del Mar Plaza, along with some of our other friends to help celebrate Ms. Lafferty’s birthday. You might recognize Krista as one of The Coast News Group’s very own. She is one of the advertising representatives who has played a significant role in the developing the world-class Health Care Series for The Coast News. This section features North County doctors located in the heart of Encinitas. I have included a photo of Krista in her tiara sitting next to the Ranch’s famous piano man, Randy Beecher. That Billy Joel song comes to mind. Also featured here are Tracy Justice and Jon Russo. Happy birthday to a friend who deserves for her birthday dreams to come true.
On May 21, I was thrilled to receive an invitation from one of Tommy V’s owner’s Charles Parisi to a fabulous sit-down dinner with the San Diego Italian Film Festival. As everyone has been waiting with baited breath to find out what will be moving into the old Flyght location, we now have that answer — Tommy V’s. I had the privilege of receiving a private tour of the newly renovated restaurant and a sneak peak at the menu. Let’s just say the sophisticated residents will love this new addition, located right in the center of the “wealth triangle” right across from the Polo Fields. Friday night my husband and I were guests at Charles’ table. We sat and enjoyed a five-course sit down menu with the finest wines from Tommy V’s personal winery in Sicily. What you may not know is the Food Network has already picked up 10 episodes on owner Tomaso Maggiore’s family. The rumor mill had it they would be there on Friday shooting for their reality show, but I think we just missed them. Congrats to Tomaso Maggiore, Charles Parisi, and Tony Renda on their hot new restaurant location that has already opened. For more information, check out their website at www.tommyvdelmar.com. I am sure you will be reading more coverage of this new hotspot in “Machel’s Ranch.”
On May 22, my husband Robin and I had dinner with his grandparents, Eddie and Dottie McCrink at Mille Fleurs. This just happened to be my father’s birthday, too. So the stars felt aligned, while I sat and dined with my new family by marriage. I had the most delightful conversation with Dottie about all of her worldly travels, the Rancho Santa Fe Garden Club and how she and Eddie met at in an art class in New Jersey, which sounded absolutely romantic. I felt so incredibly lucky to have found such wonderful family that has embraced my son, Jackson and myself. Dreams do come true. They just happen a little later in life for some of us such as myself and now I understand that old adage, “patience is a virtue.” Thank you Ed and Dottie for all of your heartwarming conversation, and for treating Robin and I to a wonderful evening.
Later that night, I ran into songbird Sacha Boutros at Randy Beecher’s 17th anniversary at Mille Fleurs. This week’s summer hat feature hat is none other than Sacha Boutros. Thanks Sacha for looking so fabulous so I could capture this gorgeous photo for the paper. Ranch residents also have their “piano man” they can count on each week, Thursday through Saturday from 8 p.m. till close. What’s wonderful about Randy is he loves the regulars, makes new guests feel special, while he singing with heart and soul. If you are having sort of a humdrum week, Randy’s music at Mille Fleurs will be sure to lift your spirits with good tunes and fun times. Thanks so much for always being lovely and bringing music into my life here under the eucalyptus trees.
On May 24, one of the Rancho Santa Fe AAA playoff games were held late in the afternoon in Fairbanks. The Thunder and Bulls teams faced off for their chance at advancing to the next game. The Bulls lost by one. Congrats to the Thunder team for making a comeback late in the game. I have featured the Bulls team here with their two coaches Jeff Cesari and Barry Robins. The Bulls didn’t win, but they gave it their all and that’s what really counts when all is said and done. Thank you to Jeff and Barry for taking time out their busy schedules to coach on the little league team. All of the boys make great strides this season, and this picture I have included captures the spirit of fun in baseball.
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